046: Stop Hiding Behind The 'I Lead By Example' Phrase

This episode is meant to challenge you. Erik takes on the lazy, surface-level claim of “I lead by example” and unpacks why it’s an insufficient leadership philosophy. He shares his own hard-learned lessons, what went wrong when he tried to evolve past it without clear communication, and why every leader needs a sharper articulation of their philosophy.

❓ The Big Question

What does it really take to move beyond “leading by example” and step fully into the responsibility of leadership?

💡 Key Takeaways

• “Leading by example” is table stakes — not the whole game.
• If your people only see your hours or outcomes, they’ll miss the process and discipline that created them.
• Leaders who only model their own way risk creating clones instead of unlocking unique strengths.
• A real leadership philosophy requires clarity: knowing your people, aligning goals, setting expectations, and holding them accountable.
• Articulating your philosophy out loud makes it easier to live it.

🧠 Concepts, Curves, and Frameworks

• Table Stakes vs. True Leadership — Why leading by example is necessary but insufficient.
• Alignment Model — Helping people connect their personal goals with organizational needs.
• Accountability Loop — Expectations, support, feedback, and trust.

🔁 Real-Life Reflections

• Erik shares the story of when he pulled back from meetings to develop his team — and how poor communication caused trust to suffer.
• By naming and clarifying his philosophy, he now has a mirror to measure himself against, instead of hiding behind the “example” excuse.

🧰 Put This Into Practice

• Write down your leadership philosophy in one clear statement.
• Share it with your team, peers, or boss.
• Use it as a daily check-in: Am I living this philosophy today?

🗣️ Favorite Quotes

• “Stop saying you lead by example. It’s laziness. It’s virtue signaling disguised as depth.”
• “Excellent leaders don’t want clones of themselves — they want to unlock the potential of their people.”
• “Your job as a leader is to align, develop, and hold accountable — not just to work hard in front of others.”